~Elina's Love Tips~
Welcome to my tips on love. Many of us try way to hard. We worry and fret about what to say and how to act. Love really comes natually to us humans. Todays TV and books relay many different meanings on the subject. Some I agree with and some are just crap! Of course we each have our own oppinions, as I do to and here I can voice it loud and clear.. why? lol It's my website of course.
No I haven't gotten some syndicated TV talk show on the subject but I have loved and lost, gained tons of insight from experience of matters of the heart as well as studied on love and romance. I am studying to gain my "Relationship Coach Credentials". I am now in progress of coaching others, helping them come to a better understanding of themselves and the ones they love.
In oder to honestly undertstand others you have to come to know and understand yourself. This isnt always an easy task.
Love Hurts
Love hurts. Yes we all have visions of this romantic love that is full of passion and understanding. A love that we think will last a life time and beyond. The fact is this isn’t always the case, sometimes for reasons we cannot understand one falls fast and hard while the other doesn’t. Chemistry, it’s a funny thing, most cases there’s no rhyme or reason. To some it seems opposites attract, while others are so much alike it’s like they were made of the same mold.
When one falls and the other doesn’t it’s a heart break as sure as the sky is vast and wide. There’s no cure and no easy answer as to why or what to do about it. Some just let time heal, while others jump into a new relationship trying to heal. This later technique is dangerous to all hearts involved. To jump into a new relationship before giving the heart time to mend is asking for more heartbreak. A good rule of thumb is take time, go slow. Start doing things that distract you from romantic notions such as hiking, bird watching or something you have wanted to do yet haven’t. Do not rush the healing process, each of us heal at a different rate. For some its only months while others can take years. If one tries to speed up this healing it may turn to bitterness and resentment that surfaces later in this new relationship. Its best to make sure you are ready before opening up that romantic door. A foot in the past makes it difficult to move freely into ones future. I would suggest learning from past hurts, not forming a void or bitterness that will hinder any future chances in ones heart. How do you know you’re ready to move on you may ask? This is a tricky question and one that’s not easily answered. Each is different, it’s a trial by error I am afraid. Wish I had a better answer. Feel it as you go, gage the “pit of stomach” feeling. I believe it’s one of those learned feelings, this goes back to the reason for taking the steps very slow so you can feel your heart mending.
One has to learn loves lessons; with each hurt and mistake one will gain experience, that’s how I see it. Love hurts whether it’s meant to or not, it’s all about learning and growing. When we’ve mastered the love puzzle we have achieved greatness. Oh you may laugh but I honestly believe this. Have you ever seen an elderly couple strolling along hand in hand as if they were teenagers? I mean elderly, like in their eighties? Chances are if you asked them how long they’d been married they most likely would say at least fifty years or so. Oh they didn’t always have this romantic relationship running smoothly, no. I’d imagine it took some rough roads to get where they are today. My point being, they learnt their lessons. Had hurts and misgivings which in turn taught them how to deal with the ups and downs of love. Most cases you won’t die of a broken heart even if you feel as though you might. You will heal and move on to love again; chances are you will even do a better job at loving and holding a lasting relationship. Learn from your hurts; make each experience a lesson, a positive one even if at the time it seems to be ripping your heart out of your chest. Love can be a wondrous thing given the chance to grow. Oh and NO you dont have to wait to be eighty before experiencing a wonderful loving relationship.